Almost two years ago we moved to Texas. No family and no friends. A year ago, I was depressed and didn't feel like I fit in with the other women in my ward. I wasn't enjoying my calling and I was being very judgemental of the people I came in contact with. I felt like I didn't fit in with the other moms my age cause I wasn't skinny, or cute, or cool enough. I so wanted to feel accepted. I had a few friends, but none that were really my age or stage in life. I blamed every one else for not including me.
A year later and a little hindsight has me re-thinking things. I never once put myself out there, because I was petrified of rejection. I never said, "hey, when do you guys go to the pool, I want to go to, so the kids can play." I never made the effort to invite people over or get to know them. I just judged from afar and that only made me more bitter.
The problem wasn't "them", it was me. I was too consumed with myself to realize I was the problem. Its amazing the changes that can take place in a year. Thanks to a great visiting teacher who literally was my saving grace, who introduced me to my best friend in the whole world, who in turn taught me to love people for who they are. Thanks to blogging, it introduced me to women in the ward I made a connection with, and would have probably never spoken to if it weren't for blogging. Thanks to visiting teaching--me being able to visit teach some of the finest women, who have taught me so much. Thanks to a Heavenly Father, who has humbled me enough to realize that all you have to do is forget yourself, love others the way He does, and accept all.
I plead to women, who have been, or who are walking in these same shoes. Reach out, don't push away. We are all going through our own battles that seem unbearable, and I know that our burdens are so much lighter when we have someone to share them with and a shoulder to cry on. Get over ourselves and love each other. I truly believe we are in each other's lives for a reason, it not just coincidence that we are here together.